The Executive Sales Coach: Keith Rosen’s Sales Blog and Business Blog On Selling, Leadership, Managing Your Team, Business and Life » management articles

Dr. Marvin Jolson was very dear mentor of mine and a true business leader; a trailblazing pioneer and innovator when it came to the areas of sales and marketing. Here was the guy who practically invented the way encyclopedias were sold door to door and the force and genius that enabled companies like Encyclopedia Britannica where he was Senior Vice President and, back in their hay day, MCI enjoy years double digit sales growth and greater profitability. In 1990, he received the Distinguished Doctoral Graduate Award from the University of Maryland. In 1999, Dr. Marvin Jolson was the first person ever to receive the Lifetime Achievement Award presented by the American Marketing Association to a scholar who has made a career of furthering the academic advancement of selling and sales management.

He’s written a library of books and has authored dozens of ground breaking articles, many of which have appeared in venerable publications and journals such as the Harvard Business Review, The Journal of Marketing, The New York Times and Sales and Marketing Management. Dr. Jolson was also the Editor of the Journal of Personal Selling & Sales Management. The legacy Dr. Jolson left behind also consisted of one of the most successful home security companies in Baltimore called CRIMPCO Security, which is currently being run by his son, and his two grandsons; leaving a strong and well entrenched empire for his family to continue to grow and nurture.

Dr. Jolson’s risk-taking tendencies, assertiveness, charismatic style is what won the admiration, respect and trust of his colleagues as well as his students. I remember, driving from my house in Potomac, Maryland about 30 minutes to the University of Maryland where I would visit with Dr. J (that’s what his student’s called him) at his office. He was the Professor of Marketing at that point, still teaching a few classes even well into his seventies. Dr. J’s open door policy transcend beyond his classroom or office. Occasionally, a student would even stop over at his house to get advice or to just say a quick hello. Dr. J made everyone feel comfortable, even his students who knew very well that the door at the home on Ridge Terrace, Pikesville, Maryland was always open.

I vividly recall enjoying the hours of debating the principles of selling and marketing with him. Dr. J would site his articles and case studies that appeared in the myriad of journals he was published in and I would share the most recent experience I had during the sales call I went on earlier that morning.

Dr. Jolson was the first person I reluctantly let review the very first manuscript I wrote; my first book on selling. Given the amount of red comments I received in my manuscript, in hindsight, I was probably better off giving him the manuscript on a day that either we agreed on a certain topic or philosophy or he ‘won’ the debate.

One of our favorite debates dealt with the level of accountability of a manager. We were both in agreement that in business, as in life you are fully accountable for everything that shows up in your life. It’s one of what I refer to as the universal principles I personally adhere to; one of the principles of attraction. As you can imagine, we also agreed that every person, every manager, is fully accountable for their communication, and that includes the message being heard by the other person.

Since we can control our communication and what we say, and we can’t control the other person’s communication and how they hear us, then we must learn to uncover and speak in a way that the other person listens and likes to be spoken to. Besides, who we are is created in how others hear us. Therefore, we must own the responsibility of the entire communication process and adjust our communication style accordingly.

While both of us agreed in this sound principle, there was always an interesting conversation that transpired when it came to discussing what factors determine the success and failure of a salesperson. That is, if a salesperson that you are managing fails, whose fault is it?

Whether your team consists of one thousand salespeople or just one, the simple fact stands; you are 100% accountable for the success and failure of your team.

Over the last several years, the media has focused our attention on some of the most devastating business failures of our time. People lost their life savings and were financially crippled by the fall of some of these business empires such as Enron, which was run by unethical, greed driven, sub-human, bottom feeders that thrived off the misfortune of others. In the wake of these ethical disasters of mind numbing proportion, the integrity of business leaders has been forced back in the limelight.

Yet, clearly not enough policing nor policy has been put in place to avoid these catastrophes from happening again, given the current state of our economy and the crisis that has crippled our financial institutions and again, the lives of millions of people. Which poses the question, have we actually learned anything from these lessons? We talk about them, and write about them but what changes have actually been made to prevent these disasters from happening again? What changes have you made as a result? Our society cannot be destined to continually be the victim of other people’s greed and their ability to shed accountability like a snake sheds its skin. Pointing the finger at the ones who profit the most from these crimes clearly has not served us well. The fact is, we all play a role.

Instead, we opt to stick our other hand in the fire by bailing them out with billions of dollars. And why not? After all, they’re too big to fail. According to Wikipedia.org, The “Too Big to Fail” policy is the idea that in American banking regulation the largest and most powerful banks are “too big to (let) fail.” Generally speaking, when a corporation, an organization, or an industry sector is considered by the government to be too important to the overall health of the economy, it will not be allowed to fail. This means that it might encourage recklessness since the government would pick up the pieces in the event it was about to go out of business. The phrase has also been more broadly applied to refer to a government’s policy to bail out any corporation. It raises the issue of moral hazard in business operations. (Gee, ya think?) The real definition of this policy is, “Once you get to a certain size in your business, you don’t have to be accountable anymore.”

It wasn’t too long ago when some noteworthy companies rose to the occasion or at least have made an attempt to do so, starting with taking full responsibility for their failures. Two companies that I’m referring to specifically are Jet Blue and Southwest Airlines. During the winter of 2007, devastating weather conditions combined with dreadful mismanagement and the poor deployment of resources caused the delays and cancellations of hundreds of flights, which left thousands of passengers stranded.

Here were two companies, who clearly screwed up – big time. But here’s what they didn’t do. They didn’t run and hide. They didn’t spin their story. They didn’t blame everything on the weather, as bad as it may have been. Conversely, here’s what they did do. They took responsibility, they apologized to their passengers, families and to the general public. They did their best to lay their cards on the table and let us know they made a big error. And in the spirit of good business practice and taking care of their customers, Jet blue offered their passengers refunds on their tickets, and in some cases, Southwest Airlines actually gave their passengers their flight for free. While it may not have been their entire fault, these companies still took 100% accountability for this debacle. They took full ownership of the problem even if the cause of the problem was outside of their control.

I guess the leaders of the growing list of failed banks, mortgage companies, investment houses and lending institutions didn’t get this lesson. The last time I checked, avalanches still roll down hill. It always starts from the top. (Here’s a chuckle. One of the banks that shut down operations was actually named, “First Integrity.”)

This is the type of mindset; one of full accountability; that a leader needs to adopt. For those ever-evolving cultures that embrace change and are strong advocates of personal development and lifelong learning, taking full accountability is a prerequisite for leadership in tomorrow’s companies, as well as for the customers that they serve. For today’s companies, how unfortunate it is that you can still survive and thrive without it. But the question is, for how much longer?

“What is that guy doing now?” It was just an odd maneuver. Something out of the ordinary from what would have typically been an everyday experience at the drive through of a Burger King. (Hey, my kids love it and no, they don’t eat this ever day; just a treat!) I was on my way back home after spending the day with the family, unaware that within the next several minutes I’d be having a breakthrough which led to the development of many of the concepts and strategies you’re going to read about in my book, Coaching Salespeople into Sales Champions.

I watched the customer in front of me drive from the first to the third window of the drive through which happened to have been closed. “What an odd maneuver,” I thought, as I noticed that the typical handoff through the drive through window was not in play. Instead, the cashier came outside, headset in tact and bags of food in hand, to deliver it directly to the window. The customer, happy to receive his order, drove off.

As I pulled up, I wondered if I too would suffer the same fate as the customer before me. Then it happened. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed a digital timer mounted above the cashier’s head near the window. At that moment, the manager at the drive in window waved me forward, without my food. “We will bring it out to you. Just pull up, please,” he requested.

The manager sent a young man out to my car and handed me my food. Wanting to understand this odd tactic, I couldn’t let it go. “I’m curious, why did we have to pull up, especially when there was no one behind me?”

“The timer,” he replied. “That’s how the manager is rated in performance. We’re supposed to serve each customer under a certain period of time.”

As a manager, is this truly a feat you’d want to be known for? This manager actually succeeded at beating the clock, yet at a greater expense and one that most managers are blind to. Then, with a puzzled look of disbelief, these managers are mystified when their staff doesn’t meet expectations of performance. This manager unknowingly or worse, consciously did his company, every customer, as well as every person on his team, a major disservice.

Is there really any wonder why there is such a shallow pool of real talent in the workforce? At some level, across every business unit, industry or profession, this is what our managers are teaching the workforce – how to skirt and dodge full accountability! And then they sit and wonder why they can’t attract better people into their organization who are fully accountable for their performance and success. Hmmmmmm.

The “I’m Sensing That” Statement

When talking with someone, such as one of your employees (or customers), did you ever get the feeling that they were not being one hundred percent honest and upfront with you? I’m often told that managers really don’t have a foolproof approach to extracting the truth, the real truth out of someone without sounding either confrontational or pushy.

Instead of confronting the person about their innate concern, the manager takes what this person says and tries to do their best to work their solution around it, even though they know that their employee isn’t telling them something.

After all, what could you say to a salesperson who you feel is not being forthright? “I think you’re lying to me or not telling me everything.” This is certainly not an approach I would endorse. Aside from putting the salesperson on the defensive, there’s a good chance that this approach will destroy any chance of getting this person to open up to you any more than they already have.

How can you tell when there’s something else a salesperson may be holding back from you? Here are a several signs.

1. A sudden change in their performance.


2. A sudden change in their activity.


3. A sudden change in their attitude, disposition or work ethic.


4. A sudden change in their behavior around the office, amongst their co-workers or towards you.


5. A reluctance to doing something they’ve typically done before.


6. A failure to honor certain commitments which they historically never had a problem doing.


7. There’s a noticeable misalignment between their intentions and their actions. (For example: You schedule a meeting to provide some additional coaching and training and the salesperson keeps canceling or delaying it due to some other ‘scheduling issues’ or sales related activities.)

Or, maybe you’re in the process of screening a new candidate for the sales position that needs to be filled. It seems the person has a clear interest in the position and you have a keen interest in hiring them but there are some inconsistencies in their resume which makes you question their long term commitment.

If you have ever run into a situation like this, there is a strong chance that there’s something else the person isn’t telling you. Here’s a great way to find out what’s really going on.

Use Your Senses

If a person makes a statement (or fails to confirm or do something for you) that causes your spider senses to tingle, trust and listen to your instincts. Remember, sometimes, just like when you’re selling a prospect, the real objection is two to three questions deep. Here’s an example of how you can use the “I’m sensing that” approach when you feel there’s something else that needs to be brought out to the surface when talking with one of your employees.

You: “Rob, based on our conversation a couple of weeks ago, do you still agree that it would be to your advantage for us to meet one to one so that you can get the personalized training and attention needed to handle some of the challenges you’re running up against?”

Rob the Salesperson: “Yes. I definitely see the benefits.”

You: “Well, we’ve been attempting to get together since then but it seems that something always gets in the way of our meeting. I know you’re working hard to bring in a few more accounts before the quarter is over but I’m sensing there may be something else that’s getting in the way of scheduling this meeting so that we can begin the work we can do together. Is that true (or, Is there any truth to this/how I’m feeling)?”

Salesperson: “Well, actually.”

And now, let the truth be known! Whether he had a bad experience with another manager, is reluctant to admit he is a little intimidated by this process, has a faulty perception of what “coaching” really means (broken wing mentality/something’s wrong with you vs. delivering more value to employees/I want to invest into you because your worth it) fears his job security, is worried what other people may think, doesn’t want to hurt your feelings by saying “No,” or wasn’t motivated by a reason compelling enough that would make this a priority, these are a few of the obstacles that can fly under your radar unless you dig deeper.

Notice the question I ask doesn’t put the person on the defensive simply because I’m not accusing him of doing anything that would make him wrong. I’m not offending him by pointing my finger and playing the blame game. For example: “Every time we plan to meet, you keep rescheduling with me.” “You told me that you were going to call me but you never did.” “You said we would be able to get together for a few minutes.” “I told you I was going to call you on Friday at 9A.M. and when I did you weren’t there.”

Instead, here’s one of the very few times during a coaching relationship that you can actually make it about you; your feelings, that is. Beginning a statement with, “I’m sensing” acknowledges how you are feeling. Then, ask the person for help in determining whether your feeling is, in fact, valid.

This approach gives the other person you’re talking with the space and permission they need to share the real truth, concern, or more of what is going on without feeling pressured. Of course, there are those occasions when the person is actually telling you the truth or simply isn’t interested in speaking with you. That’s why it’s critical to tap into your intuition and trust your instincts to determine how deep you actually want to dig to uncover the truth about what is stalling your ability to create a breakthrough in one of your people.

Are you toxic? Take the toxic leadership assessment here.

Are you leading your team or slowly and unknowingly eroding it from the inside out? Do you still navigate your ship using old school motivational tactics? Do you have your people living in fear? Are complaints rampant, as well as turnover? Are you spending most of your days putting out fires? Are you oblivious to the role you’re playing in any of this?

Do you ever stop to think that some of the challenges you’re faced with now might have something to do with how you might be managing your people and your business? The rules of business have changed overnight and the areas most impacted – sales and leadership.

How good of a leader are you? Maybe it’s time for you to abandon your role as Chief Problem Solver. Here’s your chance to get real about the behaviors and strategies you need to abandon today in order to get yourself out of your own way of producing the results you need. Then, you’ll be able to experience what my clients do: A 30% gain in sales.

In this assessment, you will find a list of 27 toxic management strategies that need to be abandoned. And for those managers, executives and business owners who take this assessment and react with, “Wait, this isn’t me.” I applaud you. Either you’re really that good – or really that blind (clueless and disconnected also come into mind- well, then there are those egomaniacal megalomaniacs, but need I digress). And make sure you take the coaching assessment to ensure you’re most effectively leading and coaching your people.) However, just to make sure you don’t have your blinders on, feel free to share this assessment with your team and have them fill this assessment out this assessment on you, anonymously, of course. Can you handle the truth?

Finally, for those people who are reading this blog and feeling as if they’re being managed by this type of manager, I give you this warning. If you have any desire to share this assessment with your manager or boss, make sure you know how they’ll receive it – as a subtle gesture of good will and compassion or a threat and an insult? If the latter, consider doing it anonymously.

take the toxic leadership assessment here.

Here’s a great new resource worth using. It’s alltop.com. Alltop.com collects stories from “all the top” sites on the web. They have grouped these collections into individual Alltop sites based on topics such as sales, environment, photography, science, Muslim, celebrity gossip, military, fashion, gaming, sports, politics and automobiles. At each Alltop site, they display the headlines of the latest stories from dozens of sites and blogs.

Think of an Alltop site as a “digital magazine rack” of the Internet. Alltop is attempting to enhance your online reading by both displaying stories from the sites that you’re already visiting and helping you discover sites that you didn’t know existed. Their goal is simple: provide “aggregation without aggravation.”

The way it works is this: They import the stories of the top news websites and blogs for any given topic and display the headlines of the five most recent stories (except Moms.alltop which has fewer headlines because there are so many feeds). When you place the cursor over a headline, alltop displays part of the story so that you can decide if you’d like to read it. To read the story, click on its title. To go to the home page of the site, click on its domain name. That simple. Take a look and let me know what you think.

This is pretty neat! My book, Coaching Salespeople into Sales Champions is being translated into a Chinese and Czech version! Below are the details.

Global Rights Deal Announcement for Coaching Salespeople into Sales Champions: A Tactical Playbook for Managers and Executives by Keith Rosen

We are pleased to report a Global Rights Department license for the following title:

Author: Keith Rosen
Title: Coaching Salespeople into Sales Champions: A Tactical Playbook for Managers and Executives
ISBN/PL: 0470142510/H

Here are some details of the deal:

Rights Licensed: Translation/Simplified Chinese
Licensee: Enterprise Management Publishing House, CHINA

Rights Licensed: Translation/Czech
Licensee: Computer Press. a.s., CZECH REPUBLIC

The Top Ten Self-Sabotaging Behaviors Managers Engage In that Prevent Positive Change

Every manager wants to develop a team of champions. Yet, only a select few have been able to truly realize this goal and enjoy the benefits that follow. Not that sales quotas aren’t being achieved; they’re just being done so at a greater expense; the managers’ time, resources, peace of mind and energy. However, the truly great managers realize they first need to learn how to coach their people to the top and develop that missing discipline of leadership.

If your marketplace has changed, then you need to change with it. Einstein said it best. “The level of thinking that got us here is no longer enough.” Managers and executives need to embrace the new rules for engagement when it comes to communicating with their people as well as attracting, retaining, motivating and building a world class team. The majority of managers are simply doing it all wrong, creating the very problems they are desperately looking to avoid.

Especially within a tough marketplace, business owners and managers who want to shift from surviving to thriving need to develop an entirely new skill set and mindset, which is counterintuitive to how they currently do things. Here, I’ve exposed ten of the most popular self-sabotaging behaviors managers engage in that prevent positive change and some strategic solutions to them.

1. Get Out Of The Fear Based, Survival Driven Mentality
   Many of our decisions are governed by fear. Lets face it; we’re all pretty good at articulating what we don’t want to happen in our lives yet fall short when trying to come up with a vivid picture of what we do want or our goals and dreams. If you know what you don’t want and don’t know what you do want then where do you think you are going to continually wind up directing your thoughts and energy? Your goals and dreams don’t even stand a chance! Instead, empower your dreams and goals rather than your fears to be the driving force that moves you forward. Otherwise, you’re breeding a culture based on fear.




2. Become Process Driven vs. Result Driven
   Like many professionals, there’s often pressure to reach quota or a certain level of acceptable performance. While having a monthly goal keeps your eye on the prize and your focus on the end result, it may actually do more harm than good. The irony is, this constant push to reach sales numbers keeps you hooked on the goal, diverting your efforts away from refining the selling process needed to generate more business. The quandary then becomes, “I’m too busy to work on my process. I have numbers to meet!” Consider this paradox; the result is the process. Shift most of your attention away from your goal or the end result and onto the process. After all, you don’t do the result; you execute the process, which produces the result as a natural byproduct of your efforts. By honoring the process, you can enjoy the benefit of knowing that you will attain your goals.




3. Get Off The Adrenaline Train
   Many people today are hooked on a commonly abused, yet elusive drug whose widespread use seems to be flying under our radar. That drug of choice is adrenaline. The classic symptoms? Saying “Yes” when you mean “No.” Overcommiting or overbooking your schedule, then finding it difficult to deliver on deadlines or complete tasks. Procrastinating until the last moment. Believing you, “Work best under pressure.” Being easily distracted. Tolerating stress, chaos, disorganization, poor planning, lackluster team performance or undesirable customers create situations that provide the adrenaline rush associated when working on overdrive.




4. Develop and Implement a Tactical Turnaround Strategy for Underperformers
   Without having the awareness and discipline to develop and execute a turnaround strategy when needed, the costs to every company are great. There are a myriad of reasons why a salesperson fails and why a turnaround strategy is a vital component needed to ensure their long term success. Managers need to be acutely aware and sensitive to the fact that some turnaround situations will result in termination or the salesperson deciding to leave on his own accord. Regardless of the underlying reason why a salesperson isn’t performing up to desired expectations, a four week turnaround program will help you identify what’s really going on and provide you with the framework to quickly determine how you can turn around an underperformer in less than thirty days or whether you and your company are better off without them.




5. Take Full Responsibility For Your People
   If you want to become powerful, hire a powerful coach. It’s a simple, yet highly effective strategy. If you want your salespeople to be powerful, you need to be a good role model for them. As you evolve, so does your team. Consider this truth: Your team is a reflection of you. After all, avalanches roll down hill. If you’re not prepared to be 100 percent accountable for the success and failure of your team, if you skirt accountability in any way, if you lack professionalism or proficiencies in certain areas, your team will reflect these weaknesses.




6. Don’t Be Seduced by Potential
   The greatest seduction managers fall victim of is the seduction of potential. Are you keeping someone aboard who isn’t serving the best interests of the company? The “Lets just wait and see” approach is a surefire strategy for failure. Are you trying to be the “good guy?” Are you worried about having to refill the position? Are you attached to making this person work out? Every day you keep a bad hire aboard costs the company money, time, leads and many selling opportunities. Don’t let your staff keep you prisoner. Look at the numbers. Make your decision based on their activity and productivity, not on your emotions. Remember, “hope” isn’t a strategy.




7. Develop a 30 Day New Hire Strong Start Orientation Program
   Regardless of your product or sales cycle, every manager needs to be able to confidently assess whether or not someone is going to ‘make it’ within their first thirty days on the job. What do you expect from a new hire within the first thirty days?




8. Make Confidence A Choice
   What if we don’t allow external situations to dictate our internal condition? What if your confidence is, simply just a choice you make about yourself? A belief in yourself? What if you could choose to be confident, choose to have faith in yourself and adopt an unwavering belief in your abilities, regardless of the outcomes of each day? Consider for a moment that you have already proven yourself and all of your future accomplishments are achieved as an expression of what you value or the value you want to deliver to others. If you can believe in this, your confidence now becomes unconditional as it is now based on who you are and the quality of the person you are, not simply what you do or what you produce. It’s trusting in yourself without any proof to back up your conviction.




9. Relinquish Your Role as The Chief Problem Solver
   Stop giving the answers to your staff. All this does is create more dependency on you. Instead, learn to ask the right questions in order to get your employees to develop their own problem solving skills and come up with the solutions on their own. If they create the solution, they own it and if they own it they’re more apt to act on it rather than being told what to do.




10. Stop Oiling the Squeaker – Start Enrolling (Not Selling) Your Team
    Investing your time in the wrong person is an exercise in futility. Strop rewarding the underperformers with your time and support and focus on the ones who are truly committed to generating the expected results. And that’s achieve through the Art of Enrollment, the new language of leadership.

Who Do You Coach?

“Who should I be coaching?” I’ve been asked this question hundreds of times by both internal sales and corporate coaches as well as those looking to build a career as a coach and develop a sustainable coaching practice on their own.

The short answer is that not everyone is coachable.

You can determine if people are ready to be coached by who they are—the degree to which they are receptive to making positive, long-term change both in their thinking as well as in their behavior. This determination is less about what the people do or their position, age, industry, experience, education, knowledge, or intelligence. Remember, coaching is about building sales champions from the inside out.

The following six qualities need to be present in the person and the coaching relationship in order for your coaching to have a profound impact. I’ve identified these attributes by the acronym A. G.R.O.W.T.H.

A. G.R.O.W.T.H. Success Indicator to Determine Personal Coachability

1. Actionability. A combination of both action and ability. The word represents both the actions that will drive success as well as the person’s actual proficiency and aptitude. Without action, nothing happens. And without the person’s innate ability and intelligence to carry out the task as intended, the action becomes an exercise in futility. As I tell my clients, “If you’re only willing to do today what you did yesterday, then what do you need me for?” This holds true for both action in your thinking and in your doing. Coaching is based on forward movement by engaging in activities you either haven’t tried, haven’t done consistently, or haven’t modeled on established best practices. (You may have been engaging in the activity in a less than effective manner.) In addition, action is the effort you put forth to change your current beliefs, your attitude, and how you think.

2. Gap. Simply put, the gap is the space between where the person is now and where they want to be. It is the space where new resources, beliefs, skills, strategies, and dialogues are cocreated by you and them. This gap stands in the way of the person’s goal and where the magic and power of your coaching occur. We will spend some time later in this chapter discussing how to uncover and coach the gap.

3. Responsibility and Ownership. I connect these two characteristics because there is a symbiotic relationship between these traits: One cannot exist without the other. If the person you are coaching is unwilling to take full responsibility for her life, career, or for the outcomes produced throughout the coaching process, your coaching will be ineffective. The coaching sessions can quickly turn into an environment for excuses. What’s worse, coaching someone who is unwilling to take total ownership of her success creates a situation where the coach can easily become the scapegoat and validation for the salesperson’s lackluster results, failures, and inefficiencies.

4. Willingness. How badly does your salesperson want to achieve the goals she has laid out? Is this person willing to go above and beyond what her peers are doing to achieve what matters most to her? How has she demonstrated evidence of her commitment and desire to achieve the outlined objectives? Determination and drive are the fuel that propels the coaching forward. Without an unconditional willingness to forge ahead, even in the face of adversity and doubt, you may find that these meetings quickly turn into a prodding or pushing session. The danger is, you may start pushing harder than the person is ready for and then you are dictating the agenda rather than the salesperson.

5. Trust. Trust is the backbone of any relationship, especially a coaching relationship. The foundation of trust is even more essential if the person you are coaching is your employee, peer, or coworker. As with respect, trust is earned. What have you done to earn the trust of the person you are coaching? Or, what have you done to destroy the trust between you and a person you are coaching? Can it be repaired? Can you trust the person you are coaching? Do you have evidence that makes them untrustworthy? Listen to your instincts on this. If you can’t trust them, don’t coach them.

6. Honesty. Honesty is distinct from trust. Honesty refers to the ability of the person you’re coaching to be open and vulnerable with you, the coach. Honesty relates to the degree in which the salespeople not only share with you pertinent information about themselves, their situations, challenges, upsets, and inspirations but also their willingness to look inside themselves and embrace the truth in every situation, whether they like it or not. Part of the role of a coach is to hold up that proverbial mirror so that people can see the truth of what’s going on, what’s getting in their way, and what they need to do to achieve unprecedented results. A defensive attitude creates an unhealthy coaching environment.

Although planning for a great year is healthy and productive, during our quest to accomplish more we often lose sight of what is occurring today. Sure we live in the present, but is that where we are truly living and responding to in each moment? Consider that most of our time is spent either living in the past or in the future.

Where is the focus of your energy and thoughts? Are you focused on making today great or on wishing you said or did something differently at different points in your life? Do you have an internal dialogue that begins with, “If only I….” or “I should have done that because then my life would have been better.” In other words, responding to and “living in the past.”

Conversely, are you trying to get somewhere in the future, as in, “Once I make a certain amount of money, then my life will be complete, or “Once I finish this project and eliminate these problems, then I’ll be happier and have more time for myself and my family.” In essence, living in the future, a point in time that doesn’t even exist!

We often live, listen and react from the past or are pushing for something to happen in the future. To be fully present means you are able to focus on a single person, idea or topic. It means not having any preoccupations with the past or future, the two points in time we have no control over! Living in the past or in the future (vs. planning for the future) consumes our energy and time, since we are not responding to, engaged in and creating a great present.

If You’re Not Present and Engaged in the Moment, You Can’t Be:

1. Listening


2. Creating


3. Engaging


4. Connecting


5. Asking Better Questions


6. Coming Across as Authentic (which is reflected in your tonality, resonance, pacing and languaging)

Being fully present takes practice, effort and focus. Living in, responding to and thinking in the present will enable you to embrace the magnificence life offers today without sacrificing what is most important to you (friends family, health, etc.) in an attempt to “get somewhere.” Learn to master each moment in time, realizing that what is always takes precedent over was and what will be. If you can practice this, the quality of your life will greatly increase.

A great partnership is like a great marriage – precious and rare. And like any marriage, after the honeymoon period ends and the realities of life kick in, a good partnership is always worth saving. Here are a few things you can do to ensure you’ve done everything to salvage your partnership.

1. Revisit the Company Goals: Are all partners still bought in?

2. Revisit Job Descriptions: is each person doing their best in the role that’s been designed for them? Or worse, is the lack of clarity around each person’s job position causing the dissention and conflict in the first place?

3. Revisit your Vision: Are all partners still in agreement regarding the end game and where they ultimately want to company to be?

4. Get a Coach. a coach can facilitate the difficult conversations that partners are reluctant to have. Whether it’s due to avoidance behavior (avoiding conflict and controversy) or a lack of skill in communicating a coach can uncover resentments be an unconditional third party and help facilitate solutions that the partners were unable to do or even see on their own.

5. What Has Changed? Life changes, people change, priorities change. Has there been any changes in the lives of the partners, either personally or professionally? Sometimes partners grow out of their roles or simply lose interest. Sometimes changes in a person’s personal life affect their decisions that relate to their business. So, is there still a fit?

6. Over-Communicate: Rather than talk honestly and openly quite often people seem to do the opposite; they shut down their communication, making the costly assumption that “This is a dead end. My partner doesn’t understand me.”

7. Facts or Assumptions? I can’t begin to count the number of times that the very problems that have destroyed the partnership were based more in assumptions rather than on the facts. Don’t react to what you think is happening but really isn’t. Instead, focus on getting the evidence that supports your feelings to avoid making decisions you may later regret.

8. Take the High Road. Like a good marriage no partnership is ever going to be an even 50-50 split of responsibility and effort all the time. If you’re playing the “That’s not fair, I’m working harder than my partner” game, this will only lead to greater resentment and ultimately a toxic relationship. Are you standing on your Ego Pedestal and your principles, or can you let some things go that really don’t make a difference in the long run. Stop majoring in the minor things that you can overlook, especially if your partner’s natural skills, talents and the value they bring to the company exceeds their minor hang ups or idiosyncrasies.

9. Regular Partner Meetings focused on You. I’ll never forget the first time going to the doctor after my first child was born. After the initial check up, the doctor turned to my wife and I and asked a question I have yet to hear from any doctor since. She actually asked, “So, how are the both of YOU doing?” When parents only focus on their children, they lose sight of focusing on each others personal needs which they need to continue to focus on in order to maintain the integrity and strength of their relationship. Schedule partner meetings more frequently. A partner meeting is different from a strategy meeting or a meeting to discuss employees or goals. This meeting is about YOU and making sure all your needs are being met and how the partners can work better together and support each other.